Saturday, November 14, 2015

The Friday the 13th Paris Attacks Conspiracy

From the CDN Ministry of Truth

I will state my conclusions in brief, so that those of you who want to remain asleep can just head back over to your regular (mind) programming: FauxNews, C(ontrolled)N(ews)N(etwork), and M(edia)S(pin)N(eo)B(ohemian)C(rime). The Friday the 13th Paris Attacks were the most blatant manipulation of reality yet by those pushing the planet toward WWWIII. The coded signs are all lined up like bowling pins (the overlords tell you exactly who is responsible), and the terrible black ball of death rolls down the Champs-Élysées to knock down the innocent pins who get in the way.

Now, for those of you ready for a reality check, let's go over in detail each part of their latest conspiracy against us.

The Date

13 November 2015

I know it is just slapping most of you in the face, but please be patient while I explain it to our new friends starting to wake up.

On Friday, October 13th, 1307, the Templar Knights were purged from France by an order of King Phillip the IV. This is the source of the superstition that Friday the 13th is an unlucky day. It is widely known that during the purge, a good number of Templars escaped and sailed to their secret base on Oak Island in North America, vowing to return with their American brothers and free their master, Jacques de Molay, who was still being held captive. Unfortunately, 1307 happened to be the first year of the Little Ice Age, and the Templar's ship ended up being stuck in the ice at Oak Island, in a seemingly never-ending winter. The French and American Templars had to walk back across the Atlantic sea ice (which is how the Solutreans got to America during the previous Ice Age). The Templars arrived in France on 13 November 1315, only to find out that their master had been executed the previous year. It was then that they vowed to avenge his death 1000 years hence.

Now many have said that the Templars could not have walked across the Atlantic Ice bridge as their armor would have been too heavy and cracked the ice, but that is absurd. In 2013, a mass grave was discovered in Brittany containing the skeletal remains of hundreds of North American seals buried alongside ropes that were carbon dated to the 14th century. It is clear that the Templars trained seals to carry their armor piecemeal across the waters of the Atlantic. The seals were then slaughtered and buried when they arrived in France, so there would be no witnesses to the return of the Templars.

The Venue

Much has been made of the detonations at the Stade de France, as if that was the epicenter of the attacks. Less well known is that the bombings there didn't even disturb the feetsball match between Germany and France yesterday (which France won 2-0; note that 20 is the number of Templars who returned from America to save de Molay). But the main target of the attack was the Bataclan theater. I know ... I know ... please stop telling me how obvious the symbology is, there are people still waking up who must know the truth!!! You have to remember there was a time when you did not know either!

Bataclan, weird name, right? Bataclan is equivalent to the word caboodle in English. Caboodle is derived from kit and boodle, and means whole and complete. They chose this venue to tell you that their 1,000 year revenge plan for Friday the 13th is complete. A boodle is also an expression for counterfeit money and stolen goods. All the wealth that was stolen from the Templars by the French has now been taken back, and the attack on the Bataclan is a coded message that France is officially broke.

Now there will be those who want to link the 1933 fire that gutted the Bataclan theater to this conspiracy, and you need to look very carefully at people who are trying to do that because they are probably agents of disinformation or dupes spreading disinformation released by others. It is true that the Reichstag fire of 1933 and the Bataclan fire of the same year were both part of Adolf Hitler's rise to power, but don't buy into the lie that Hitler ordered the Bataclan burned in order to cover up the years he spent there moonlighting as a cross-dressing cabaret dancer during WWI. Yes, he had the legs for it, but it is just not true.

The Band

Who was headlining the night of the attacks? The Eagles of Death Metal. PLEASE!!! Stop shouting at me how obvious all this is. I have enough of a time concentrating with all the other voices in my own head, don't add your voices to the cacophony! The Eagles of Death Metal cover themselves in Satanic imagery, showing who they truly serve. First look at the Templar seal of the "Spread Eagle", then look at two images from The Eagles of Death Metal.

 Templar Seal - The Original Eagles of Death Metal

Peace, love, and "death metal". What are bullets if not "death metal"?

It's hard to count all the satanic symbols in this last one. Just note "Kiss the Devil" at the top right. Those "killed" were sacrificed to Satan, so they are now in hell, "kissing the devil". The man at the bottom left is a "wannabe" satanist, sacrificed using a knife that has a pyramid eye in the handle! The knife even pierces his Third Eye. The Lion is the Lion of Judah, who has the Satanists in its power but does not bite down - it lets them live as long as they serve its purposes.

Some may accuse me of being insensitive to the slain, but they just don't get it - there are no slain. No one died in this false flag / black op. The borders were sealed to give the alleged victims the opportunity to flee the country without being noticed! The "slain" were the satanic Templars making their escape, just as they did in 1307. Except this time, they got their treasure back. The bombs at the stadium made sure that the French government would shut down their transit systems, but the Templars have more trained seals than ever to use to ride to freedom. Wake the hell up!

The Simpsons - as Always

Final proofs. More predictive programming on the Simpsons. Yesterday's narrative was established in a timeline over the course of several years of controlled image releases.

The Eagle (side of the postbox) covertly travels to Paris from America. You can't see it clearly but your subconscious mind registers that each stamp is actually post marked for 13 Nov 2015.

The Death Metal cleverly renamed "TinTin", his hands concealed to show he is hiding something. Up at the top left, what your conscious mind picks up as prints in the snow, your subconscious mind sees as puffs of gun smoke from the barrel of a rifle. Up at the top right, a row of blank gravestones that Death Metal "TinTin" is creeping by.

The French dupes are left with faux pearls (before swine), while the eagle is rewarded with her rightful inheritance. America, represented by Homer, is also flat broke when the Templars are done with him.

One more troubling thing - the pink egg the eagle left on the table. Her next plan remains, as yet, unhatched. You have been warned.


  1. Great stuff, almost as good as the ralf wiggum
    Dylan roof conspiracy

    Some disturbing news from jewbucks cofee,they are planning on turning 67 stores into gay safe spaces
    "hello customer you like some feces or
    AIDS with your overpriced nasty coffee,?perhaps a dildo?"

    1. Wait ... they're saying Starbucks wasn't already a safe place for the queers? I thought the only point of bringing Starbucks to a town was to have a place for fags and dykes to congregate and be smug leftists together.

  2. I'm game for a good conspiracy as much as the next guy. All conspiracies might not be completely correct, but there definitely is something shadowy taking place behind the scenes.

    However, what the author states is completely out of left field. From Templars to Hitler to Satanists and finally wrapping things up with the Simpsons. Bravo friend. I'd like to see your room. I envision random pictures and articles from various publications all linked in a web of multicolored string.

    1. I appreciate your right to other perspectives, but please don't parrot the conspirators. Left field - another attempt to discredit the Truth Movement. Do you want to know the origins of the term "out of left field"? It originated as part of the Warren Commission investigating the murder of JFK. They would say that about anyone who didn't believe the official narrative of the lone gunman was suggesting that the bullet came "out of left field" (i.e. the grassy knoll). People nowadays try to trace its origin to baseball, but that is totally out of left field.