Wednesday, January 08, 2014

Murder by "Atomic Wedgie"

How can this be real? An Oklahoma man, Brad Davis, is accused of murdering his stepfather, Denver St. Clair, by what Davis described to the police as: "an atomic wedgie".

 Quoting this article:

According to the affidavit, St. Clair had multiple blunt force injuries to his face and his "elastic underwear waistband had been stretched up over his head," leaving a ligature mark around his neck.

After investigators acquired a warrant to search Davis' cellphone they found photographs that show St. Clair lying in the living room floor in a smear of blood, according to the affidavit, and there were pictures prior to having his underwear pulled over his head as well as after.

Top Five Jokes for Murder by "Atomic Wedgie":
1) Who taught this guy how to kill people, Nelson Muntz?
2) St. Clair should have just given his stepson his lunch money.
3) Davis's serial killer catchphrase: "Just wait until I get my Hanes around your neck."
4) Davis's serial killer catchphrase alternate: "Choose how you want to die - boxers or briefs?"
5) Davis should have stuck by his original explanation for the murder - killer underpants gnomes.

I have a great idea for Brad Davis - I think he should hook up with the woman who stabbed her husband to death with a ceramic squirrel. Imagine the comic mayhem they could cause together!

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