Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Dick D'nasty

I have never watched an episode of Duck Dynasty. However, I have seen the ZZ Top-esque people on the Duck Dynasty show interviewed by the news media, but I have barely paid attention when they speak. I know the show is a current popular fad, and that's about it. I am purely guessing now - but the show is about people who hunt ducks for living? OK, I've Googled it - its about a family who got rich making duck calls. Whupdifreakin doo.

Today, I overheard two women saying that one of the Duck Dynasty men "got in trouble for bashing homosexuals". When I got home, I went looking for this particular piece of hate, hoping for something truly incendiary. I should have known better. According to this article, the imperial wizard Phil Robertson said:

“It seems like, to me, a vagina—as a man—would be more desirable than a man’s anus. That’s just me. I’m just thinking: There’s more there! She’s got more to offer. I mean, come on, dudes! You know what I’m saying? But hey, sin: It’s not logical, my man. It’s just not logical.” [...]

“Everything is blurred on what’s right and what’s wrong... Sin becomes fine,” he said. “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men.”

These sub-lucid statements have brought righteous condemnation from GLAAD. Al Sharpton was quick to chime in on the controversy, adding that Robertson's comments he [Robertson] did not witness racial animosity prior to the Civil Rights movement were "narrow-minded".

Now for AA's take on the matter:
1) Pseudo-celebrities should keep their mouths shut and ride the gravy train while it lasts. By making inflammatory statements, pseudo-celebrities do nothing but give demagogues the opportunity to cash in on the celebrity's temporary fame in order to advance whatever agenda the demagogue is pushing.
2) Robertson's comments were meandering and pointless. Of course he has a right to say them, and of course he is entitled to his beliefs, but going into the mechanics of a vagina offering more than a man's anus was kind of strange way to make an argument in favor of traditional relationships. As in, why choose your wife's vagina over a random man's anus? Well, the vagina is offering 3.9% APR and a free tote bag!
3) Just how long do you think it will be before Robertson backpedals, ends up retracting his statements, and makes an impassioned apology while lorded over by some representative(s) of the minorities he offended? Money always talks loudest in these situations, and I predict either Robertson will apologize as described, or he will be forced off of his program.

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