Saturday, October 26, 2013

Don't give us Carrabba's


What is it with restaurant customers committing hate crimes instead of tipping? Recently, we had the story of Red Lobster nigger waitress Toni Jenkins, who (supposedly) found the word nigger scrawled upon a receipt in place of a tip. And today we showcase this story, of a faggot waiter from Carrabba's who was left a lengthy, homo-hating diatribe instead of a tip. Quoting the diatribe:

"Thank you for your service, it was excellent. That being said, we cannot in good conscience tip you, for your homosexual lifestyle is an affront to GOD. [Faggots] do not share in the wealth of GOD, and you will not share in ours," the customer wrote. "We hope you will see the tip your [fag] choices made you lose out on, and plan accordingly. It is never too late for GOD's love, but none shall be spared for [faggotry]. May GOD have mercy on you."
I have many questions about this story:
1) Just how long was the bill? Was he serving the entire Westboro Baptist Church?
2) What magnifying glass did he have to use to read all that on the tip line?
3) The waiter's mother is the hostess of the restaurant - are we sure she didn't pocket the tip and leave the note as a way of discouraging her son's behavior?
4) Are we sure the waiter isn't copycatting the Toni Jenkins incident to drum up sympathy?
5) Why did the customers not have a problem with the faggot touching their food, but they were so disgusted as to not leave him a tip?
6) How did the customers know he was a faggot? Did he toss their salad before he tossed their salad?
7) Did he pop the cork of the wine bottle using his butt cheeks?
8) Did he sodomize himself with the pepper grinder?
9) Did he take them to the booth with a glory hole carved into the wall?
10) Did he offer them his home-made white sauce?

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