Monday, June 20, 2011

It's the Jews, eh?

A young man in Canada has been up to some mischief with a spray can. After being lectured by the judge, the teenager was forced to meet with the victims of his "hate crime". Read here, watch here. Below, I have prepared a brief memo to this young fellow.

Dear Calgary Commandant,

First, let me commend you for your interest in Nazism, and your skepticism regarding the received wisdom of your elders. The judge apparently did not realize the irony of chiding you for disrespecting the Canadians who died for your right to speech, when in Canada "hate speech" can put one behind bars for a decade.

That being said, I must inform you that your actions did nothing but strengthen those you lashed out against. You are an anonymous pariah, and they are righteous victims once again. For when there are none like you spray painting their monuments with swastikas, they will spray their own to keep their victimhood intact. Therefore, what you did was simply save them a couple shekels on spray paint. Vandalism, thuggery, and blustery sword-waving will leave you like this, or this, or this.

There are several options you may choose:

1) Put it behind you and slip into mediocrity.

2) Continue your petty crimes or ramp them up and face jail time either way.

3) Repent and become their hand puppet, speaking to school children about how much you now love the righteous Jews.

4) Go underground and be patient.

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